Okay, now that the correction's been issued... who wants more Revealing Eden awfulness?
Nobody? Too bad.
Eden's sitting in the shade of a palm tree, fanning herself, and the text makes a big deal of how hot she is -- her skin is "clammy" and "the unforgiving noonday sun bleached the compound with stark light." I believe it was mentioned in an earlier chapter that the tunnels she's lived in all her life could get up to a hundred and ten degrees, so it seems weird that she'd be complaining about being hot NOW when she's lived in extreme heat all her life. And if the surface world were THAT much hotter than the tunnels, there shouldn't be any plant life left. But hey, since when has this book cared about internal consistency?
The minutes slowly ticked by, cycling into hours, then long passages of the day. She never realized how long an hour was or how much time she had at her disposal. What had she done with all her time? She had frittered it away with fantastical World-Band experiences. That had helped her bury her feelings -- she could see that now. At least she hadn't felt this stifling boredom. -- p. 170
Foyt, please don't make a statement about technology and social media ruining young people right now. You're over halfway through this book, you don't have time to botch up another "message."
Eden looks out into the forest and wonders where that "dumb beast" Bramford is. I'm still failing to see why we should want to see these two paired up at all -- Eden has shown zero romantic interest in him, only moments of weird lust. If Foyt expects us to believe that this pair has the makings of a true Beauty and the Beast romance, she's done a very poor job of showing it. Even in the Disney version of the tale, Belle felt SOME measure of kindness toward Beast as the story went along...
Probably the only good thing about this book is that it's
reminding me of MUCH better books and movies
that I need to re-read/re-watch
The kids of the village are playing in the garden, and Eden notes that the parents don't seem irritated by the kids' noise but are enjoying the clamor. She figures that "maybe they didn't know how boring their lives were." Maybe they don't have time to be bored because they're busy trying to eke out a living in the jungle, you brat.
The little boy from earlier toddles up to Eden and offers her a cucumber, which "glowed in the sunshine, as if it were more than a vegetable." In video games that generally means it's a power-up, but I dunno what it's supposed to mean here. She takes a bite and notices that it doesn't taste at all like the cucumber flavoring in her food pills. Um... if I remember correctly, the pills they used to sustain themselves were only fat, carbohydrate, and protein. I saw no mention of veggie pills. Consistency? Who needs that?
Lorenzo appears out of nowhere and walks into the hut, and Eden follows him. She notes that these people have no respect for boundaries and thinks that maybe that's how they move through the world with so little effort. Foyt has a way of throwing out these random thoughts that are supposed to be deep and introspective but come across as stupid.
Eden's father gives Lorenzo a list of supplies he needs, and explains that Lorenzo's going to the city. This is the first I've heard of a city... I thought everyone lived underground now? Unless they're referring to Lorenzo going to the Combs, but I was under the impression that those were kept locked down pretty tight. Again, who needs consistency when you can just throw in whatever random ideas and concepts that pop into your head?
I don't need internal consistency, I got a hard-hitting anti-racist
furry romance to write!
Eden's heart skipped a beat. She asked when he would leave. "Cuando vas?"
"Ahora."
"Now? Right now?"
"It could be a year from now," her father said.
"How is that possible?"
"The Huaorani never use the future tense, you see. For them, only the present exists." -- p. 172
First of all, I thought Eden didn't know any Spanish. Sure, her Spanish is pretty broken here, but she's still managing to communicate and understand. Again, consistency! Readers are going to notice continuity errors, people.
Also, I can't find anything to confirm or deny Dr. Newman's statement here, but it does seem pretty stereotypical to assign to a Native American tribe. Just my thought.
Eden apparently plans on escaping with Lorenzo, but doesn't tell him that -- she just asks for a comb. As he leaves she notices that the sky's overcast now, and thinks that the weather's "as changeable as Bramford's moods." I dunno girl, you seem to vacillate between fawning over him and hating his guts pretty rapidly -- who's the one with changeable moods?
Despite herself, Eden wondered where Bramford would find shelter. She pictured him lying across a tree branch, his powerful body balanced with effortless grace, licking his lips from some tasty treat. Her body turned to jelly. -- p. 173
Yes, I'm still Undertale trash... no, I'm not sorry,
the line's just too fitting
Speak of the furry devil... Eden spots Bramford pouncing around in front of the locked hut, punching and lashing out at the air. And of course she assumes the worst.
Was this some sort of primal dance or demonstration? Or was he trying to intimidate his prisoner, Rebecca? -- p. 173
Girl, we don't even know if this Rebecca girl still exists or is even here. Get some evidence that she's actually around before you accuse Bramford of holding her captive. And while I have no idea what he's doing here, surely he's got better things to be doing than mocking a captive.
Lightning crashed down, illuminating him. Eden saw his wet face, mashed with hair, and forgot all about her missing twin. His strong legs kicked and jumped, making her feel small and delicate, and at the same time, aggressive and full of daring. An earthy moan escaped her lips.
Bramford immediately zeroed in on her. She swore she could feel the heat coming off of him. Her yearning grew unbearable. Was it for her sake or Rebecca's that she flew towards him? She no longer cared why. She simply knew she had to be with him, whatever that meant. -- p. 173
Yes, I will subject you to all the "romantic" hormonal bits in this book. Because dangit, someone has to suffer along with me.
She runs into the rain, yelling his name, and he grabs her in his arms and tells her to go away. Because holding onto her is REALLY the best way to get her to go away... She yells at the hut for Rebecca, asking if she's there, and Bramford puts his mouth on her neck. I'm not sure if he's trying to bite her or give her a hickey, the text isn't terribly clear -- it just states that "Bramford's mouth found her neck."
Was Foyt trying to mimic the cheesy kiss-in-the-rain scene from The Notebook here? Because that's the vibe I'm getting...
I really hate to say this because I don't like Nicholas Sparks,
but... The Notebook did it better
Thankfully Maria interrupts the sappy moment and pulls Eden away from him, leaving her confused and "desperate to understand." Maria takes her to her father, who insists that she needs to leave the whole Rebecca thing alone. I'm going to guess this doesn't happen, Eden has a long and glorious track record of not listening to a thing other people say.
Eden goes and cries on the bed, having a pity party with herself.
She shut out the storm and the whole crazy world. In her mind's eye, she only saw Bramford's piercing gaze. She ran her hands over her arms, recalling his indelible touch.
Good Earth, she simply had to get away from him or she would die. -- p. 175
Seemed fitting...
Please tell me that not all romance is this clunkily written. It's been a long time since I read half a Twilight book just to see what all the fuss was about, but if I'm remembering right even the bad romance of that book wasn't half as bad as THIS...
Maria shows up at that moment, probably feeling sorry for Eden (don't waste your pity, lady), and she gives her a dress -- Rebecca's dress from the painting. Can somebody please tell us who the frag this Rebecca chick is and why she looks so much like Eden? I'm getting sick of the text telling us she's important without telling us WHY.
Eden takes off the scummy dress she's been wearing all this time and puts on the other dress, apparently startled that it reaches down to her calves -- apparently it's no longer the fashion to wear dresses long. And the dress smells like jasmine, which is Eden's favorite scent. Okay, the similarities between these two girls is getting really annoying, can SOMEONE explain things please? Was Eden a twin separated at birth, or a clone of someone, or what?
She admires the dress, which is white with blue "string" threaded through the bodice, and we get this:
She never considered how color or shape might affect her mood. Or how empowering such a personal choice could be. She thought of Aunt Emily, who had worn only white for many years, and in a similar style, too. Had such pretty clothes made her and Rebecca feel beautiful? -- p. 176
Ugh, I'd hoped we'd dropped the Aunt Emily nonsense by this point -- I still don't get why Emily Dickinson has to be dragged through this mess. And nice to see our protagonist still only cares about being beautiful despite all she's been through. This is a really empowering message to send to girls, isn't it, Foyt? *sarcasm*
She admires herself in the hand mirror (it's cracked, so that means seven years back luck, right?) and thinks she looks even more like Rebecca now than ever. And her last thought before the chapter ends is "what would that callous beast think of her now?" *sigh* I'm getting so tired of this "I love you, I hate you" business... dangit, I'm just getting tired of this book. Seriously, I have a headache now...
Going to try to speed up the pace here, just because I want to be done with this garbage soon. Then move on to the next book. Bitterwood is going to be fun to tear apart, and for all its flaws it at least doesn't have this racist garbage to contend with...
You know it's bad when Twilight writes a better, more interesting romance....D:
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