Chapter 32 -- Even Furries Have Standards

Okay, let's get this over with... long-ish chapter, brace yourselves...

Eden wakes up to the "slow, sweet whistle of the quail-like tinamous" (just saying "a bird" would have worked just fine, Foyt), and is surprised to find herself on the ground.  Then she remembers "her torturous night with Bramford" and her "bitter, broken heart," because apparently all the lovey-dovey sweet talk of Chapter 30 was aimed at Bramford's former mate, the treacherous Rebecca.  I'm sorry, I'm still not feeling a whole lot of sympathy for our protagonist, and trying to wring it out of the reader by force rarely works.  You can't get blood from a turnip...

Speaking of Bramford, look who's spooning with her right now.  Mixed messages much, Bramford?

His chest and hips rounded her like a protective mantle.  A heavy arm was slung over her waist.  The warmth he generated cushioned the cold, dewy ground.  Eden nestled into his embrace -- only for warmth, she told herself.  He softly groaned, pulling her closer.  His lips tickled the top of her head. -- p. 225

If I have to suffer through this "romantic" writing, 

so do you

Eden decides Bramford's just dreaming about Rebecca, and feels his attentions "rubbed like salt thrown onto a wound."  Um... the saying is "hurt like salt rubbed onto a wound."  You've got your metaphor a little mixed up there...

Bramford goes to put out what's left of the fire and inspects the area "as if reading the daily news."  Wait, they have newspapers in the far future?  Eden pouts that his gaze moves over her "just like any other part of the landscape."  Oh geez, are we going to get Eden pouting and moping all this chapter?  Nooooooooooo...

Also Bramford's injured hand apparently healed almost entirely overnight.  So being a jaguar furry now gives you super-healing powers?  Maybe Kartoon12 was right in the comments of the last post -- maybe Bramford IS Wolverine's father.  XD

Of course, the plot conveniently remembers that Eden broke a rib, and she doubles over in pain.  Bramford doesn't notice, and Eden snaps at him.

"Hey," she called to Bramford.  "Remember me?  I'm Eden, by the way, not your dead mate, Rebecca." -- p. 226

Ouch... that was low, Eden.  Why are you being so childish about this anyhow?  It's not like it's Bramford's fault that he mistook you for his mate.  Okay, so it was his fault he got stoned out of his mind and hallucinated things, but still... this behavior's bratty and uncalled for.  

Bramford demands to know how she knows -- evidently he forgot about the whole "getting high in the jungle" bit of the last few chapters.  Eden doesn't answer the question, just says she knows Rebecca betrayed him and that they had a kid together.

"Your son Logan is hidden in the gated hut, isn't he?"

Bramford's jaw muscle began to twitch.  "I'm warning you.  It's none of your business."

"That's no way to treat a child."

"You don't understand."

"I understand how cruel you are."

He shook with rage, his weight sunk low.  "I didn't know it was all a lie."

Go ahead, Eden thought.  Rip my body apart -- my heart is already in pieces. -- p. 226-227

I'm sorry, but when our protagonist has done nothing but whine endlessly, screw things up for every other character, and act like a racist little twit, I can't spare a lot of sympathy for her having her heart broken by a jaguar furry.  This is a big reason why I don't read a lot of YA romance -- all too often it's about whiny teenagers/young adults with no personality doing nothing but angst about love and heartbreak.  It's obnoxious to read about, and is far more likely to make me want to slap the character in question than sympathize with them.

Bramford tells Eden it's time to go home and picks her up.  Okay, why is our main black character feeling the need to haul our main white character's butt all over the jungle, especially if this is supposed to be a future where black people are the dominant race?  I don't know about anyone else, but having a powerful black man carry around a delicate white woman as if he were a pony or a slave just screams "racist" to me.  For supposedly having an anti-racism agenda, this book sure has a lot of uncomfortable racist imagery.

Eden feels tortured being carried by Bramford now, and tries to focus on the sounds and smells of the jungle instead.  The air turns cold and clammy, and she suspects a storm is coming in.

"Is it going to rain?" Eden asked, not quite trusting her budding instincts.

"Is it?" Bramford replied.

"Yes.  I think so."

"Let me know when you're sure." -- p. 227

Of course this pisses Eden off, because anyone who doesn't immediately call her perfect is evil, doncha know...  She also thinks that his earlier comments about him teaching her were meant for Rebecca, and he really doesn't care if she learns how to survive in the jungle.  Good, neither do the readers, girl...

A swarm of Callicore cynosura butterflies flitted past, their hypnotic black and white markings as fantastical as having imagined that Bramford loved her. -- p. 228

Um... what?  Bad metaphor, Foyt, bad metaphor, no cookie.  The markings on the butterflies might be "fantastical" as in "strange and beautiful," but not "fantastical" as in "imaginary."  Think before you try to twist a metaphor into something that doesn't fit.

I've been using this meme a LOT this book

She stole a glance at him and caught her breath.  A pale ribbon of morning light shone on the rugged, feline face, so at odds with the human intelligence that peered through his captivating eyes.  Would she ever know him?

Perhaps if Eden solved the mystery of the FFP's hold over Rebecca, she would understand Bramford.  And if they could talk about it, maybe his mat'es ghost would no longer torture him.  Would he see the Real Eden then? -- p. 228

Please don't try to work in another plot point, book, you only have eighty pages to go...  

It starts to rain, just as Eden predicted, and as they head back to the village she can hear Bramford's heart beating in his chest.  She wonders if it would beat for her if she were a she-cat.  Ugh...

They get back to the compound and are greeted by Maria, who takes them to the house where Dr. Newman's staying.  Eden sees how weak he is and thinks that he looks like "a frail, little bird.  A dying bird."  Oh please, don't tell me this book is going to kill him off to try to milk more Wangst out of Eden... 

Bramford carries Eden into the hut, and she's shocked to see tears in her father's eyes.

She never had seen him cry; not even at her mother's death.  Like father, like daughter.  Why did they have to travel to this primitive place to express any emotion? -- p. 229

I dunno, there are any number of reasons why people cry or don't cry.  Some people have difficulty crying while they're grieving, while others cry at the drop of a hat.  Everyone expresses emotion in different ways, and it's not always indicative of a problem.  Just my two bits.

Bramford takes Eden to Rebecca's old room, and she hopes he'll react to Rebecca's portrait with indifference, but he never looks at it.  Girl, accept it, he's just not that into you, all right?

Eden needs this book...

They snark back and forth a bit, Eden griping about sleeping on the cold ground out in the jungle, and Bramford looks about to say something when Dr. Newman and Maria come in.  Bramford hands over the anaconda tooth, saying it's the DNA sample he needs, and Eden starts to tell him about the battle but Bramford shuts her up.  Yeah, I wouldn't want to talk about saving Eden's life either, bud...

Also, Eden thinks of Bramford as "her father's beastly creation."  BEASTLY.  IS NOT.  A COMPLIMENT.  I'm getting sick and tired of Eden still calling Bramford a beast every five minutes.  Argh...

Anyhow, the last critter they need a DNA sample from is a jaguar -- which everyone still insists on calling un tigre.  JAGUARS.  ARE NOT.  TIGERS.  Stop calling them that.  Also the Spanish word for "jaguar" is... well, jaguar.  It's not like there's no equivalent for the word jaguar in Spanish.

Maria doesn't approve of them going out to kill a jaguar, seeing as they're considered sacred by her people, and she leaves when Eden's father insists "what is one more jaguar in the face of such progress?"  That's... actually a fairly reasonable reaction.  It's thinking like that -- anything can and will be sacrificed for the sake of "progress" -- that ruined the world in the first place, after all.  Small wonder someone whose world has been utterly wrecked by "progress" is upset with that sort of reasoning.

Oh wait, Eden brings that up in the next paragraph.  Eek, I feel soiled for sharing thoughts with our protagonist now...

"Isn't that the kind of thinking that got us here?  One more tree, one more acre, one more jaguar -- they matter."  She questioned Bramford too.  "What about you and your sorrowful solastalgia?  How can El Tigre even consider killing a jaguar?" -- p. 231

Where's that shower?

Bramford insists he can't do anything for anyone in his current shape.  Dr. Newman says if they could just make more humans like him, it might be better, but he insists "I'm just trying to survive" and exchanges a "meaningful" look with Eden, who wonders what he's thinking and whines to herself that he makes her "work so hard" to figure out their relationship.  I don't think you even HAVE a relationship right now, girl...

"I'm sorry, but it's all wrong.  Don't you see?  What will happen to us if you get killed?  And what about your son?"

His eyes went flat.  "What about him?"

"If you're not concerned for our welfare, at least consider your son's before throwing yourself in the path of a deadly animal." -- p. 232

Is... Is Eden actually being halfway reasonable right now?  Was that something intelligent and almost empathetic toward another person coming out of her mouth?

I am honestly, honestly shocked at this.  This might be one of the few, if not only, times in this book that Eden has been halfway reasonable and smart about something that's come out of her mouth.  And for once she's worried about someone other than her, someone not connected to her.  Cherish this moment, folks... savor it.  It may be the one and only glimmer of intelligence and genuine human emotion we get out of Eden this book.

Aaaaaaaaaaaand Eden promptly ruins it.  Bramford insists he's no good to his son or anyone else like this, leaves, and Eden's only response is "selfish beast."  Never change, Eden... never change.

Dr. Newman and Eden bicker over whether they think Bramford had a chance against a jaguar.  Dr. Newman asks why Eden should care -- a reasonable question, given that as far as he's concerned she loathes his guts still.  Eden says she's just thinking about Bramford's son, and Dr. Newman's response is "what child is this?"

Stop having your characters converse in song lyrics,

this is FanFic 101 we're talking about here...

Eden tells her father everything she learned about Bramford, Rebecca, and Logan.  Her father just shrugs and says "wait and see," and shuffles off.  Eden's left to think over this matter for herself... but she just lets her thoughts wander straight back to fantasizing over Bramford.

Bramford's affection undoubtedly would be lethal when he reached full adaptation.  No, if Eden ever wanted to feel the burning heat of his kiss, or the strong press of his body, or hear his tender purr, only one way remained.

Adapt?

She laughed out loud.  why lose what little physical appeal she had for someone who loved another?  Besides, a real jaguar probably would kill him.  She simply couldn't think about Bramford another minute.

And yet, as Eden closed her eyes, the wild feelings he aroused ran through her, as inescapable as the blazing light of day.  And the kiss -- the memory of their long, burning kiss -- brought a moan to her lips. -- p. 233

I will never apologize for this screencap

I swear this book was either originally written as a furry novel and converted into a horrible sci-fi dystopia WITH A MESSAGE to try to appeal to a wider audience, or Foyt learned about the furry fandom and decided to rewrite her horrible sci-fi dystopia WITH A MESSAGE to try to appeal to a niche fandom.  Either way, I'm sure even furries don't want to be associated with this dreck.  They have standards too...